I empathize with the frustration women have experienced with online dating. I am 33 and feel like I'm too old for it and have aged out of the system also, after seeing almost all the guys I need overlook me for women in their 20s on these sites (and no, I actually don't just hold out for 10s-even the 7s and 8s will go for the 20-somethings as well). Naughty date closest to Clifton Hill, Victoria. I've occasionally considered giving up online dating when I turn 34, since I've heard what a nightmare it's for women in the mid-30s (and have seen for myself how the interest is declining with each passing year). Yet, I might keep at it-but just not take it so personally. Sara has the correct idea to diversify the portfolio" so to speak, with real life encounters. I have had comparatively more success in real life (and occasionally gotten attention from really good-looking men who I presumed were out of my league and would most likely have blown off me on dating sites. But in real life social events, they've approached me because they said how they liked that I was dancing and having fun-which is tough to capture in a still picture and also a couple paragraphs).
There is plenty more here, as I discovered when I first came here over a couple of years ago; in fact, compared to some of what I read about my generation of guys (baby boomers) here, that one is absolutely light and benign. I have read far more hateful invective on this blog, couched in rhetoric computed to be as offensive, inflammatory, hurtful, degrading and emasculating as possible, aimed at ALL (a frequent declaration) men in my age group. The authors of this kettle of hater-aide? Just the youthful thirty and forty-something women fed up with the improvements of creepy old men"? Nope; the women of my own generation, for the most part, occasionally egged on by young men like Nathan, who seems to believe his generation devised notions like introspection, self awareness, and personal growth, along with pretty much everything else (see his self serving, patronizing little discourse on old Boomer men" below). Notice how he follows up with this small jewel, The age and photo driven nature of online dating makes it harder for Boomer women to shine, regardless of what they do." Naturally, the unspoken declaration is the fact that Boomer men have no such issue, and if they do, they deserve it. I beg to differ. The ones of us who will actually date women in our own age group, are automatically rejected online (without even a profile perspective) by most of precisely the same women, who now feel entitled to men from 15 years younger to no over 2 years older than themselves (or so say their online profiles). Let a man express interest in virtually any woman younger than himself, and he is promptly labeled a creep, a pervert along with a dirty old man; yet women like Ellen come here, can not resist bragging about dating guys 17 to 22 years younger than me" and the chorus of applause from the distaff side is deafening. Pot, meet kettle!
I have determined if my bf and I break up (God PROHIBIT as I'm very in love with him) I won't return to online dating but will give celibacy a shot. Dating after, say, 58 or 59 ISN'T worth the effort imo. Maybe 'cause eventually you're stuck with all these bitter, old, paranoid,hypocritical boomer guys. I don't know....Am alright with my solitude now. Crave it actually (bf and I 've a long distance relationship but just 72 miles). We're only apart about 4 nights before reunited though. And intend to dwell together sooner or later later on. So my dating experience can be best summed up by the old standard Just in Time". Listen to the Streisand variant circa 1965.
The amusing thing is both me and my current bf ONLY dated younger for the most part when online dating. He said it was vanity on his part and I told him I did it'cause I could (get away with it). But asI've stated numerous times on this particular website, I also was only able to date younger (my usual taste except for my current same-age bf) cause I lied about my age. Shaved off quite a number of years too girls! lol I was born in 1953, but wouldput 1960 or1961 on my profile. What helped is I have a killer figure (slim, but curves, 36D) and pretty face thanks to years of intermittant plastic surgery (but nothing below the waist til recently (coolsculpting which I recommend). Myplastic surgeon's nurse says I job youthfulness and look, on a good day, in my 40s still. So, I've had a clear edge. I guess I am one of the fortunate ones, but I think it is a combo of my character, a sort of God glow"/spiritualityand looks. Men have always been attracted to me in person. Big time. Occasionally it was flattering and occasionally a issue honestly.
I have the same observation. Andrew. For awhile I was amazed at women's profiles with their shopping list of demands (don't contact me if...you must be blah blah blah....""with no statement of what they have to offer. Surely a guy can collect much about a lady from reading her profile, and women are often so inundated with answers from inferior matches they become exasperated and start to set bounds; yet for me this language indicates an attitude of entitlement and self absorption, and suggests maybe an assumption that she's the more desired one in the deal. Maybe women are used to being pursued. A more sensible mature girl will comprehend that relationships are not just about her and her needs. Certainly men can frequently behave the same manner, just wanting sex. I consider the deeper truth is the fact that many folks merely blunder unconsciously into relationships, compelled by their ill comprehended desires, knowing neither themselves or what they need from a connection.
Debby, you are discussing rot as far as I am concerned. I'm 62 and let me tell you, I Have had nights" with women 20-30 years younger and they don't even ask what I do for a job. Naughty Date near Clifton Hill Victoria. Certainly the long term prospects aren't good with a much younger woman. But in my experience a great deal of much younger women go for me. They say I'm a silver fox and attractive lol - Sorry, but as much as you'd like to believe it's about a cynical cash grab, I need to tell you we mature men, like some elderly women entice the opposite sex. Regrettably, a lot of people don't attract the opposite sex. nature is cruel.
Men over 45 do have more options regarding dating. But there are certain ways around this. First, a woman has to specifically say what she offers a guy (that he needs) in the context of dating and relationships. I have read thousands of female profiles (35-55 years old) and almost not one of them actually say what they offer a guy. Naughty Date nearby Clifton Hill Victoria Australia. Generally, it is a record of demands and choices. This really isn't good advertising. A female must have the ability to answer the question What do I provide a man he needs?" If she does not know, (or is offended by the question) she is not prepared for dating.
Kathleen, I am an elderly guy and many women on line in my age group make out they aren't interested in the younger men. But of course they're. It's just that all the younger guys approaching senior women are mainly, looking for what they consider to be the fastest method to get easy sex. They simply show interest in men their own age when the supply of younger men dries up, or the men begin to lose interest in them. It's insulting to me. And that is the reason why I'm not interested in the women, my age who approach me.
I get what you're saying. When my marriage fell apart a year ago people attempted to assure me that I was a grab. And I still matter I should be - am tall, trim, seem youthful for 48, run my own successful firm, understand just how to dance, am a community leader with environmental education and in my profession, lecture at university, write, from an exotic place (Alaska). As a result I'm very busy so online dating looked like the solution. But in fact in six I can count on one hand the amount of women who've written back and no genuine dates. I picked women in my own date range and attractiveness range. Simply to check I wrote to quite older women and not as appealing than myself. Nothing. Got on Tinder and swiped almost every woman. Attempted all types of images. Nothing. Clifton Hill VIC Naughty Date. When I talk to my female friends they say they are inundated. The only dates I've had, 2, were from old buddies who both told me they'd been fantasising about me for years but then they left it at that and scarcely return my calls. Naughty date near me Clifton Hill VIC. At Meetups women seem interested however they do not respond. Simply do not comprehend this, it's as if they expect me to pursue them and I 'm unwilling to do that because the two times I did that when my marriage was souring forever alienated good buddies. Really out to sea on all of this - so much has changed since I was last dating 26 years ago.
I feel like I am aging out" of internet dating. I have noticed after my last birthday (I turned 54 in June) that the answer I get on has dropped to almost nothing. It is as though going from the early 50s to the mid 50s is some sort of death-knell for a dating life. I begin contact with guys in an age-range of about 3 years younger up to about 8 years older than myself. The possible matches the website sends me are age appropriate for me, but when I look at the age-range that those guys desire, (usually 35-50) I often go past them, knowing I can not compete with women in their desired range, even though many of those guys are as much as 5-8 years old than me! To put it differently, knowingly sends me matches that are likely not realistic for me to pursue. When I've emailed a number of those men, I don't hear back. I'm guessing they check out my profile, see my age, and probably read no further. Even if I'm within their desirable range, I still don't get much of a response. I suppose the reason for this is they can get younger women to respond to them, so why would they go for me when they've a chance with the 45 year-old version of me? If their first wife was their age, such as, for instance, a college honey or whatever, they likely feel entitled to a newer version, so to speak. Our culture supports this. It is frustrating, as well as depressing and more than a little humiliating. It's the built-in folly of on-line websites: you're merely defined by your age, in bold type right next to your user name.
One more thing. I'd like to ask all my middle aged internet dating male and female compatriots a party favor. Please, let's rid our profiles of these overused phrases once and for all: glass-half-full, sexy, play-free, and easygoing. And these, let's omit these also: "I look 10 years younger than I am," "I loathe talking about myself, but..." and all derivatives of "my pals/mom/ex-husband/children tell me that..I'm a glass-half-total optimist, who is easy going and looks 10 years younger than I am." I think that if we can all really agree to clean up our profiles then perhaps, just perhaps, we can find some common ground and get back to the work of falling in love (or at least having fun trying).
Naughty Date in Clifton Hill. Stop Using Your Profile to Whine about Men. Several guys noticed how many women's online dating profiles are comprised chiefly of complaints about men - either their profiles, or their behavior in general. I agree with the guys on this one. There is absolutely no point in using your profile story as a soapbox for your negative understanding of all single, middle-aged men (for heaven's sakes utilize a blog for that). So while I'm sure there are guys (and women) out there who are logged on and behaving badly, I really believe that women must take responsibility for their own picks. We can keep our favorable expectations while at the same time heeding our inner voice that warns us when something isn't quite correct. Much too frequently some women are guided not by common sense, but by wishful thinking and also a want to be fine and not appear ill-mannered, so we ignore the big, red flashing warning lights raging in our heads and continue without caution. I once met a woman who expressed great depression that she just could not trust the guys she met online. She then continued to tell me a story about any of these men who spent days (yes, days) wooing her via email. He told her stories of his limitless wealth and his links to powerful people all over the world. She slept with him on the second date (after he promised to whisk her away to a private island that next weekend). But that is not all. She also gave him all of her identifying information when he told her that she needed to be vetted by "his folks." And guess what? Yep! Her identity was stolen. Whining about how she could only no longer trust guys she met online was a bit like whining about how she could only no longer trust Nigerian princes.
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