Tone Down the Boudoir Shots. You say you want a good guy who honors you as a human being and is interested in having a serious relationship with you, then you post pictures of yourself next to your bed (or on your own bed, or in your bed, or in somebody else's bed). And if you aren't posting photos of yourself next to your bed, (or on your bed, or in your bed), you are posting pictures with way too much cleavage. Now, that's totally great - I have no problem at all with this, and I am certain many men do not have a problem either - but what some guys do have a problem with is when women post said super-sexy glamour pictures and then complain to their buddies, or make statements on their profiles about how all men are dogs and only need them for sex. College Sluts nearby Modbury, SA. And while we are on the topic of criticism-filled profiles...
Athletic and Toned Means, well, Athletic and Toned. I despise the body descriptors as much as you do (well, except for you size 0 women out there, you almost certainly love them), but I do believe it's significant that we at least strive for honesty. The word on the street is that far too many women out there in the internet dating world are employing the "athletic and toned" descriptor in reference to their "about average" bodies (this complaint applies to guys also, of course). The matter is, there really isn't anything wrong with having an around typical (or curvy) body so let us take the pressure off ourselves and heed the advice of Amy Schuler, and recognize once and for all that a little meat on our bones isn't going to kill us, and it isn't going to drive away the good guys either (appropriate, good guys?).
No. More. Instagram. Pictures. I really like Instagram photos because many of the filters make my eyes look strikingly blue (or green, or lavender), and some even shave about ten years off my face. But do I post these photographs on my internet dating profile? No I do not. Why? Because my eyes aren't really that blue (or green or lavender), and I am about 10 years older than my Instagram photos would have you believe. This was the number one criticism among the guys I interviewed - artistically filtered (i.e., delusory) photographs. Truth in advertising ladies, truth in marketing.
Manner too Many Pet Photographs. This was a huge gripe among the men I interviewed. They are taking a look at your profile to find out more about you, not your pets. So delete the pet pictures, especially the ones without you in them. Oh and while we're on the topic of pet photos, I 've a private request of all you single, middle-aged women out there on dating websites: please, please, please delete any and all photographs of your cats. College sluts nearest Modbury, SA. This is really significant. I can not emphasize it enough. Single, middle aged women already must cope with much too many negative stereotypes, as well as the cat photos (you cuddling with your cats, you kissing your cats, multiple cats on your own bed) merely function to augment them. I once wrote a blog post about how dating occasionally made me feel unwanted , and I got hundreds of comments from single middle-aged men throughout all of North America informing me that I must live in a dark flat with 100 or so cats, so really, please delete them. College Sluts nearest Modbury SA.
Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I Had focus on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am far more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. The following list is my best effort at summarizing the outcomes of my informal survey, with some of my own observations predicated on a bit of research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you're a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Anyway, here goes:
I can't say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your own bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a guy standing next to an open toilet, or just a toilet paper dispenser, is an immediate turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you are doing something fun (like fishing or watching football). Or, in case you don't have a selfie stick, shoot your profile photograph the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In the event that you don't have a single friend who can take your photograph, or you don't possess a smartphone, then you likely shouldn't be dating in the first place.
I'm not the only one seeing these trends. Often, when I get together with my single girlfriends the matter of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I Have looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men because I sensed they were extremely nice guys. And let us just say that I was not surprised when they discussed their frustrations with online dating - of seldom receiving e-mails from women, of their e-mails frequently going unanswered. I needed to grab these guys by their shoulders, and give them a solid (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my feelings about their errant advertising techniques. But I've always resisted the temptation to do so from a fear of seeming rude and ill-mannered.
Some of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a couple gasp-worthy pictures. These profiles can be a great source of entertainment, especially if wine is included. But what I find somewhat troubling are some fairly disturbing tendencies I Have noticed in many men's profiles who seem to be fairly standard otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating beginners, jumping back in the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a particular degree, uncertain of what the other sex is looking for, or how to get their focus. However, these gaffes are so apparent that I believe it is time someone starts a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?
I've been a member of a well-known internet dating service for a little over a year now, and I must say that, overall, I am pleasantly surprised by the characteristic of guys I've met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain hopeful that eventually, I 'll. Yet despite my generally positive experiences, I've come across a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-guys-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of manner. Like the man who believed that picking the username "Undertaker" was a good idea, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that clearly howled "secured residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep desire to meet a girl with young children (rather boys). One of my all time favorites though was the man who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was compelled to find love on-line (yay us!).
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