Tone Down the Boudoir Shots. You say you want a good man who respects you as a human being and is interested in having a serious relationship with you, and then you post photos of yourself next to your bed (or on your bed, or in your bed, or in someone else's bed). And if you aren't posting photos of yourself next to your bed, (or on your bed, or in your bed), you're posting pictures with way too much cleavage. Now, that is absolutely great - I don't have any trouble at all with this, and I am certain many men do not have a problem either - but what some men do have a problem with is when women post said super-hot glamor shots and then complain to their friends, or make statements on their profiles about how all guys are dogs and only want them for sex. Casual Sex nearest Ashfield WA. And while we are on the topic of complaint-filled profiles...
Athletic and Toned Means, well, Athletic and Toned. I hate the body descriptors as much as you do (well, except for you size 0 women out there, you most likely adore them), but I do believe it is important that we at least strive for honesty. The word on the street is that way too many women out there in the online dating world are employing the "fit and toned" descriptor in reference to their "about average" bodies (this complaint applies to guys also, of course). The thing is, there really is not anything wrong with having an about average (or curvy) body thus let's take the pressure off ourselves and heed the advice of Amy Schuler, and understand once and for all that a little meat on our bones isn't going to kill us, and it isn't going to drive away the good guys either (appropriate, good guys?).
No. More. Instagram. Photos. I love Instagram photos because lots of the filters make my eyes seem strikingly blue (or green, or lavender), and some even shave about ten years off my face. But do I post these photographs on my online dating profile? No I don't. Why? Because my eyes aren't really that blue (or green or lavender), and I'm about 10 years older than my Instagram pictures would have you believe. This was the number one criticism among the guys I interviewed - artistically filtered (i.e., delusory) pictures. Truth in advertising women, truth in marketing.
Manner too Many Pet Photos. This was a tremendous gripe among the men I interviewed. They're looking at your profile to learn more about you, not your pets. So delete the pet photos, especially the ones without you in them. Oh and while we are on the topic of pet pictures, I have a private request of all you single, middle aged women out there on dating websites: please, please, please delete any and all photographs of your cats. Casual sex nearest Ashfield WA. This is really significant. I can not emphasize it enough. Single, middle aged women already must cope with much too many negative stereotypes, as well as the cat pictures (you cuddling with your cats, you kissing your cats, multiple cats on your own bed) merely function to augment them. I once composed a blog post about how dating occasionally made me feel unwanted , and I got hundreds of comments from single middle-aged men throughout all of North America telling me that I must live in a dark flat with 100 or so cats, so actually, please delete them. Casual sex nearest Ashfield, WA.
Last week I discussed my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I promised everyone that this week I Had concentrate on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am much more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. The following list is my best effort at summarizing the outcomes of my informal survey, with some of my own observations based on a bit of research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you are a girl between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland region, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I'm sorry, really. Anyway, here goes:
I can't say it any clearer than this: Do not post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, period. Seeing a man standing next to an open toilet, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an immediate turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as even though you're doing something interesting (like fishing or watching football). Or, should you not have a selfie stick, shoot your profile picture the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In the event you don't have a single friend who can shoot your photo, or you do not own a smartphone, then you probably should not be dating in the first place.
I'm not the single one seeing these tendencies. Often, when I get together with my single girlfriends the issue of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I Have looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men since I sensed they were really nice guys. And let's simply say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of seldom receiving emails from women, of their e-mails regularly going unanswered. I liked to grab these guys by their shoulders, and provide them a powerful (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my feelings about their errant advertising techniques. But I have always resisted the temptation to do so from a fear of seeming rude and ill mannered.
A few of these profiles represent arbitrary oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising narrative or a few gasp-worthy pictures. These profiles can in fact be an excellent source of entertainment, particularly if wine is involved. But what I find somewhat distressing are some rather distressing trends I Have noted in many men's profiles who seem to be fairly standard otherwise. I do empathize, really. A lot of us are dating newcomers, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We're all winging it to a particular extent, unsure of what the other sex is looking for, or how exactly to get their attention. But these gaffes are really so clear that I believe that it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?
I have been a member of a popular internet dating service for a little over a year now, and I must say that, overall, I am happily surprised by the characteristic of guys I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain hopeful that eventually, I 'll. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I have encounter a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-men-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who believed that selecting the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his pictures in a room that clearly yelled "secured residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his profound desire to meet a girl with young kids (preferably lads). One of my all-time favorites however was the guy who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still intensely in love with his ex-wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was driven to find love on-line (yay us!).
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