I empathize with the frustration women have experienced with online dating. I'm 33 and feel like I'm too old for it and have aged out of the system too, after seeing nearly all the men I desire overlook me for women in their 20s on these websites (and no, I really don't just hold out for 10s-even the 7s and 8s will go for the 20-somethings as well). Casual encounters nearby Regents Park Queensland. I have occasionally contemplated giving up online dating when I turn 34, since I Have heard what a nightmare it is for women in the mid-30s (and have seen for myself how the interest is diminishing with each passing year). Yet, I might keep at it-but just not take it so personally. Sara has the right idea to diversify the portfolio" so to speak, with real life meetings. I've had comparatively more success in real life (and occasionally gotten focus from quite good-looking men who I assumed were out of my league and also would most likely have blown off me on dating sites. But in real life social events, they have approached me because they said how they liked that I was dancing and having fun-which is tough to capture in a still picture as well as a couple of paragraphs).
There is plenty more here, as I found when I first came here over a couple of years ago; in fact, compared to some of what I read about my generation of guys (baby boomers) here, that one is entirely light and benign. I have read far more hateful invective on this site, couched in rhetoric calculated to be as offensive, inflammatory, hurtful, degrading and emasculating as possible, aimed at ALL (a regular affirmation) guys in my age group. The authors of the pot of hater-aide? Only the youthful thirty and forty something women fed up with the improvements of creepy old men"? Nope; the women of my very own generation, for the large part, occasionally egged on by young men like Nathan, who seems to believe his generation invented notions like introspection, self awareness, and personal growth, together with pretty much everything else (see his self serving, patronizing little discussion on old Boomer men" below). Notice how he follows up with this small jewel, The age and photo driven nature of online dating makes it more challenging for Boomer women to polish, regardless of what they do." Needless to say, the unspoken assertion is that Boomer guys have no such difficulty, and if they do, they deserve it. I beg to differ. The ones of us who'll actually date women in our own age group, are automatically rejected online (without even a profile perspective) by most of the exact same women, who now feel entitled to men from 15 years younger to no over 2 years older than themselves (or so say their online profiles). Let a guy express interest in any girl younger than himself, and he's instantly labeled a creep, a pervert along with a dirty old man; yet women like Ellen come here, can not resist bragging about dating guys 17 to 22 years younger than me" and the chorus of applause from the distaff side is deafening. Pot, meet kettle!
I have determined if my bf and I break up (God PROHIBIT as I'm really in love with him) I won't return to online dating but will give celibacy a chance. Dating after, say, 58 or 59 ISN'T worth the effort imo. Perhaps 'cause finally you are stuck with all these bitter, old, paranoid,hypocritical boomer guys. I actually don't know....Am acceptable with my isolation now. Crave it really (bf and I 've a long distance relationship but just 72 miles). We are just apart about 4 nights before reunited though. And plan to live together at some point later on. So my dating experience can be best summed up by the old standard Just in Time". Listen to the Streisand variant circa 1965.
The funny thing is both me and my current bf JUST dated younger for the most part when online dating. He said it was vanity on his part and I told him I did it'cause I could (get away with it). But asI've said numerous times on this particular site, I also was only competent to date younger (my usual preference except for my present same-age bf) cause I lied about my age. Shaved off quite several years too girls! lol I was born in 1953, but wouldput 1960 or1961 on my profile. What helped is I 've a killer figure (skinny, but curves, 36D) and pretty face thanks to years of intermittant plastic surgery (but nothing below the waist til lately (coolsculpting which I recommend). Myplastic surgeon's nurse says I job youthfulness and look, on a good day, in my 40s still. So, I Have had a clear advantage. I guess I'm one of the fortunate ones, but I think it's a combo of my personality, a form of God luminescence"/spiritualityand looks. Men have ever been brought to me in person. Big time. Sometimes it was flattering and occasionally a issue honestly.
I have the same observation. Andrew. For awhile I was amazed at women's profiles with their shopping list of demands (do not contact me if...you must be blah blah blah....""with no statement of what they have to offer. Definitely a guy can gather much about a lady from reading her profile, and women in many cases are so inundated with replies from inferior matches that they become exasperated and begin to set bounds; yet for me this language implies an attitude of entitlement and self-absorption, and suggests maybe an assumption that she is the more desired one in the deal. Maybe women are used to being pursued. A more thoughtful mature girl will understand that relationships aren't just about her and her needs. Certainly men can often act exactly the same way, just wanting sex. I believe the more profound truth is the fact that most folks merely blunder unconsciously into relationships, compelled by their poorly comprehended desires, knowing neither themselves or what they want from a connection.
Debby, you're speaking rot as far as I am concerned. I am 62 and let me tell you, I've had nights" with women 20-30 years younger and they don't even ask what I do for a job. Casual encounters nearby Regents Park Queensland. Certainly the long term prospects are not good with a considerably younger girl. But in my experience a whole lot of much younger women go for me. They say I'm a silver fox and attractive lol - Sorry, but as much as youwant to believe it is all about a cynical money grab, I must inform you we elderly men, like some mature women bring the opposite sex. Unfortunately, a lot of people do not bring the opposite sex. nature is unkind.
Men over 45 do have more choices regarding dating. However there are certain ways around this. First, a girl has to specifically say what she offers a guy (that he needs) in the context of dating and relationships. I've read tens of thousands of female profiles (35-55 years old) and almost not one of them really say what they offer a guy. Casual encounters closest to Regents Park Queensland Australia. Usually, itis a record of demands and preferences. This really is not great marketing. A female should have the ability to answer the question What do I offer a guy that he desires?" If she does not know, (or is offended by the question) she is not ready for dating.
Kathleen, I am an older man and most women on line in my age group make out they are not interested in the younger guys. But of course they are. It's merely that all the younger men approaching old women are mostly, looking for what they consider to be the fastest way to get easy sex. They simply show interest in guys their very own age when the supply of younger men dries up, or the guys begin to lose interest in them. It's insulting to me. And that's the reason why I am not interested in the women, my age who approach me.
I get what you are saying. When my marriage fell apart a year ago people tried to reassure me that I was a catch. And I still thing I should be - am tall, trim, look young for 48, run my own successful firm, understand the way to dance, am a community leader with environmental education and in my profession, lecture at university, write, from an exotic location (Alaska). As a result I am really busy so online dating looked like the answer. But in fact in six I can count on one hand the number of women that have written back and no actual dates. I picked women in my own date range and attractiveness range. Just to check I wrote to fairly mature women and not as appealing than myself. Nothing. Got on Tinder and swiped practically every girl. Tried all sorts of graphics. Nothing. Regents Park, QLD Casual Encounters. while I talk to my female friends they say they're inundated. The sole dates I've had, 2, were from old pals who both told me they had been fantasising about me for years but then they left it at that and infrequently return my calls. Casual Encounters closest to Regents Park, QLD. At Meetups women seem interested however they don't answer. Just don't recognize this, it is as if they expect me to pursue them and I am reluctant to do that because the two times I did that when my marriage was souring permanently alienated good friends. Really out to sea on all this - so much has changed since I was last dating 26 years ago.
I feel like I 'm aging out" of online dating. I've discovered after my last birthday (I turned 54 in June) that the response I get on has dropped to nearly nothing. It is as though proceeding from the early 50s to the mid 50s is some form of death-knell for a dating life. I initiate contact with men in an age-range of about 3 years younger up to about 8 years older than myself. The potential matches that the site sends me are age appropriate for me, but when I look at the age-range that those men want, (generally 35-50) I often move past them, knowing I can not compete with women in their desirable range, even though many of those guys are as much as 5-8 years old than me! To put it differently, intentionally sends me matches that are probably not realistic for me to pursue. When I've e-mailed a number of those men, I don't hear back. I'm guessing they check out my profile, see my age, and likely read no further. Even if I'm within their desirable range, I still don't get much of a reply. I assume the reason behind this is they can get younger women to respond to them, so why would they go for me when they have a chance with the 45 year old model of me? If their first wife was their age, like a school sweetheart or whatever, they probably feel entitled to a newer version, so to speak. Our culture supports this. It's frustrating, as well as depressing and more than a little humiliating. It is the built-in folly of on-line sites: you are simply defined by your actual age, in bold type right next to your user name.
One more thing. I'd like to ask all my middleaged internet dating male and female compatriots a party favor. Please, let us rid our profiles of these overused phrases once and for all: glass-half-full, lusty, play-free, and easygoing. And these, let's omit these also: "I look 10 years younger than I am," "I hate talking about myself, but..." and all derivatives of "my pals/mom/ex-husband/children tell me that..I'm a glass-half-complete optimist, who is easy going and looks 10 years younger than I am." I believe that if we can all agree to clean up our profiles then perhaps, just perhaps, we can find some common ground and get back to the company of falling in love (or at least having fun trying).
Casual encounters nearest Regents Park. Discontinue Using Your Profile to Whine about Men. Several guys noticed how many women's online dating profiles are included mainly of criticisms about men - either their profiles, or their behaviour in general. I agree with the men on this one. There is no point in using your profile narrative as a soapbox for your negative perception of all single, middle-aged men (for heaven's sakes use a blog for that). So while I am certain there are guys (and women) out there who are logged on and acting badly, I believe that women must take responsibility for their own choices. We can keep our positive expectations while at the same time heeding our inner voice that warns us when something is not quite correct. Way too frequently some women are led not by common sense, but by wishful thinking and a want to be nice and not appear ill-mannered, so we ignore the big, red flashing warning lights raging in our heads and continue without caution. I once met a girl who expressed great sadness that she just could not trust the men she met online. She then proceeded to tell me a story about any of these guys who spent days (yes, days) wooing her via e-mail. He told her stories of his limitless abundance and his connections to powerful individuals all over the world. She slept with him on the 2nd date (after he assured to whisk her away to a private island that next weekend). But that is not all. She also gave him all of her identifying information when he told her that she needed to be vetted by "his folks." And guess what? Yep! Her identity was stolen. Whining about how she could just no longer trust men she met online was a bit like whining about how she could just no longer trust Nigerian princes.
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