I empathize with the frustration women have experienced with online dating. I'm 33 and feel like I am too old for it and have aged out of the system also, after seeing almost all the men I desire overlook me for women in their 20s on these websites (and no, I don't simply hold out for 10s-even the 7s and 8s will go for the 20-somethings as well). Bbw dating closest to Dapto, New South Wales. I've occasionally contemplated giving up online dating when I turn 34, since I Have heard what a nightmare it's for women in the mid-30s (and have seen for myself how the interest is decreasing with each passing year). Nonetheless, I might keep at it-but simply not take it so personally. Sara has the correct idea to diversify the portfolio" so to speak, with real-life meetings. I have had comparatively more success in real life (and occasionally gotten attention from very good-looking guys who I presumed were out of my league and also would most likely have dismissed me on dating sites. But in real life social events, they've approached me because they said how they liked that I was dancing and having fun-which is tough to capture in a still photograph along with a couple paragraphs).
There's plenty more here, as I discovered when I first came here over two years ago; in fact, compared to some of what I read about my generation of guys (baby boomers) here, that one is entirely mild and benign. I've read far more hateful invective on this blog, couched in rhetoric calculated to be as offensive, inflammatory, hurtful, degrading and emasculating as possible, aimed at ALL (a frequent assertion) guys in my age group. The authors of this pot of hater-aide? Only the young thirty and forty-something women fed up with the improvements of creepy old men"? Nope; the women of my very own generation, for the most part, occasionally egged on by young men like Nathan, who seems to think his generation devised notions like introspection, self awareness, and personal advancement, along with pretty much everything else (see his self serving, patronizing little discussion on old Boomer guys" below). Note how he follows up with this small gem, The age and photograph driven nature of online dating makes it more difficult for Boomer women to polish, regardless of what they do." Needless to say, the unspoken declaration is that Boomer men have no such problem, and if they do, they deserve it. I beg to differ. The ones of us who will really date women in our own age group, are automatically rejected online (without even a profile view) by most of the same women, who now feel entitled to guys from 15 years younger to no over 2 years older than themselves (or so say their online profiles). Let a man express interest in virtually any girl younger than himself, and he's immediately labeled a creep, a pervert along with a dirty old man; yet women like Ellen come here, can not resist bragging about dating men 17 to 22 years younger than me" and the chorus of applause from the distaff side is deafening. Pot, meet kettle!
I have decided if my bf and I break up (God FORBID as I'm quite in love with him) I will not return to online dating but will give celibacy a chance. Relationship after, say, 58 or 59 is NOT worth the attempt imo. Maybe 'cause eventually you are stuck with all these bitter, old, paranoid,hypocritical boomer men. I really don't know....Am ok with my isolation now. Crave it really (bf and I have a long distance relationship but only 72 miles). We are only apart about 4 nights before reunited though. And intend to reside together sooner or later later on. So my dating experience can be best summed up by the old standard Just in Time". Listen to the Streisand version circa 1965.
The funny thing is both me and my current bf ONLY dated younger for the most part when online dating. He said it was vanity on his part and I told him I did it'cause I could (get away with it). But asI've stated numerous times on this blog, I also was just competent to date younger (my normal preference except for my present same-age bf) cause I lied about my age. Shaved off quite several years too girls! lol I was born in 1953, but wouldput 1960 or1961 on my profile. What helped is I 've a killer figure (slender, but curves, 36D) and pretty face thanks to years of intermittant plastic surgery (but nothing below the waistline til lately (coolsculpting which I recommend). Myplastic surgeon's nurse says I endeavor youthfulness and look, on a good day, in my 40s still. So, I've had a clear advantage. I guess I'm one of the blessed ones, but I believe it's a combo of my personality, a kind of God glow"/spiritualityand looks. Men have always been brought to me in person. Big time. Sometimes it was flattering and occasionally a difficulty honestly.
I 've the same observation. Andrew. For awhile I was amazed at women's profiles with their shopping list of demands (don't contact me if...you must be blah blah blah....""with no statement of what they have to offer. Certainly a guy can assemble much about a lady from reading her profile, and women in many cases are so inundated with answers from inferior matches that they become exasperated and start to establish borders; yet for me this language implies an attitude of entitlement and self absorption, and indicates maybe an assumption that she's the more desirable one in the deal. Perhaps women are used to being pursued. A more thoughtful mature girl will recognize that relationships are not just about her and her needs. Clearly guys can often behave exactly the same manner, only wanting sex. I believe the more profound truth is that many people merely blunder unconsciously into relationships, compelled by their poorly understood desires, knowing neither themselves or what they want from a connection.
Debby, you're speaking rot as far as I am concerned. I am 62 and let me tell you, I've had nights" with women 20-30 years younger and they don't even ask what I do for a job. Bbw dating closest to Dapto New South Wales. Sure the long term prospects are not good with a much younger girl. But in my experience a great deal of much younger women go for me. They say I'm a silver fox and attractive lol - Sorry, but as much as youwant to believe it is all about a cynical money grab, I have to inform you we old guys, like some elderly women entice the opposite sex. Regrettably, lots of people don't attract the opposite sex. nature is unkind.
Men over 45 do have more options regarding dating. But there are certain ways around this. First, a woman has to specifically state what she offers a guy (that he wants) in the context of dating and relationships. I have read thousands of female profiles (35-55 years old) and virtually not one of them really state what they provide a guy. Bbw dating closest to Dapto New South Wales Australia. Normally, it is a listing of demands and preferences. This isn't great marketing. A lady must be able to answer the question What do I offer a man that he wants?" If she doesn't know, (or is offended by the question) she's not prepared for dating.
Kathleen, I am an elderly man and most women on line in my age group make out they aren't interested in the younger men. But of course they are. It's only that all the younger guys approaching older women are mainly, looking for what they consider to be the quickest method to get easy sex. They just show interest in guys their very own age when the supply of younger men dries up, or the men begin to lose interest in them. It's insulting to me. And that is why I am not interested in the women, my age who approach me.
I get what you are saying. When my marriage fell apart a year ago people attempted to assure me that I was a catch. And I still thing I should be - am tall, trim, seem youthful for 48, run my own successful business, understand how to dance, am a community leader with environmental education and in my profession, lecture at university, write, from an exotic area (Alaska). As a result I am really busy so online dating looked like the answer. But in fact in six I can count on one hand the number of women who've written back and no actual dates. I picked women in my local date range and attractiveness range. Simply to check I wrote to quite elderly women and not as appealing than myself. Nothing. Got on Tinder and swiped almost every girl. Attempted all kinds of graphics. Nothing. Dapto, NSW bbw dating. When I speak to my female friends they say they are inundated. The sole dates I've had, 2, were from old buddies who both told me they'd been fantasising about me for years but then they left it at that and scarcely return my calls. Bbw Dating nearest Dapto, NSW. At Meetups women look interested but they do not respond. Just don't understand this, it is as if they expect me to pursue them and I am unwilling to do that because the two times I did that when my union was souring permanently alienated good pals. Really out to sea on all this - so much has changed since I was last dating 26 years ago.
I feel like I am aging out" of online dating. I have found after my last birthday (I turned 54 in June) that the response I get on has dropped to virtually nothing. It is as though moving from the early 50s to the mid 50s is some kind of death knell for a dating life. I initiate contact with guys in an age-range of about 3 years younger up to about 8 years older than myself. The possible matches that the site sends me are age appropriate for me, but when I look in the age-range that those men want, (normally 35-50) I frequently go past them, understanding I can't compete with women in their desired range, even though many of those men are as much as 5-8 years old than me! In other words, knowingly sends me matches that are probably not realistic for me to pursue. When I've emailed some of those guys, I never hear back. I am guessing they check out my profile, see my age, and probably read no further. Even if I'm within their desired range, I still do not get much of a reply. I presume the reason behind this is they can get younger women to react to them, so why would they go for me when they've a chance with the 45 year old model of me? If their first wife was their age, such as, for instance, a college sweetheart or whatever, they likely feel entitled to a newer model, so to speak. Our culture encourages this. It is frustrating, not to mention depressing and more than a little humiliating. It's the built-in folly of on-line websites: you're just defined by your age, in bold type right next to your user name.
One more thing. I'd like to ask all my middleaged online dating male and female compatriots a favor. Please, let's rid our profiles of these overused phrases once and for all: glass-half-full, sensuous, drama-free, and easygoing. And these, let's omit these also: "I look 10 years younger than I am," "I hate talking about myself, but..." and all derivatives of "my buddies/mother/ex-husband/kids tell me that..I'm a glass-half-complete optimist, who is easy going and looks 10 years younger than I am." I believe that if we can all really agree to clean up our profiles then perhaps, just perhaps, we can find some common ground and get back to the business of falling in love (or at least having fun trying).
Bbw dating nearby Dapto. Discontinue Using Your Profile to Complain about Men. Several men noticed how many women's online dating profiles are included chiefly of criticisms about men - either their profiles, or their conduct in general. I agree with the guys on this one. There's no point in using your profile story as a soapbox for your negative perception of all single, middle-aged men (for heaven's sakes utilize a blog for that). So while I'm certain there are guys (and women) out there who are logged on and acting badly, I believe that women must take responsibility for their own selections. We can keep our favorable expectations while at the exact same time heeding our inner voice that warns us when something isn't quite appropriate. Much too frequently some women are guided not by common sense, but by wishful thinking and also a want to be fine and not seem rude, so we ignore the big, red flashing warning lights raging in our heads and proceed without caution. I once met a girl who expressed great sadness that she just couldn't trust the guys she met online. She then proceeded to tell me a story about any of these men who spent days (yes, days) wooing her via e-mail. He told her stories of his limitless prosperity and his links to powerful individuals all around the world. She slept with him on the 2nd date (after he promised to whisk her off to a private island that next weekend). But that is not all. She also gave him all of her identifying information when he told her that she needed to be vetted by "his people." And guess what? Yep! Her identity was stolen. Whining about how she could simply no longer trust men she met online was a bit like whining about how she could only no longer trust Nigerian princes.
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